Both of these parents work from home... Why am i even here??

UGH!
Stinking people.
i'm moving to a remote planet and only taking Keshia and Jesse.
Pluto here we come!

Oh, Africa!

Maybe its just me, but who could say no to these adorable faces?!
I mean really?!!?!

107 days until I'm onto the adventure of my life.

I have been tremendously blessed with wonderful donations from wonderful people.
I'm almost to my half-way point, I still have a while to go, but I'm getting there.
I will get there.


Its time to move on.
No more living for us.
I'm tired of living for just me.
No more.
It's time to go love on the children that God loves.
Time to go love on children that no longer have parents.
I've always been drawn more to orphans anyways. I just have this heart for them!
I'll have to adopt a couple of em.

Ha oh man. I love these people.

#909
Remember that everyone you meet wears an invisible sign. It reads, "Notice me. Make me feel important."

We don't like-like Jesus. We love Jesus. And we cannot love Jesus from a distance.

Failure is an event, not a person

I'm 65

I like novels
I like the rain
I like open windows
I like to open my windows when its raining
I believe that God knows my color-scheme
I prefer soft food.. like bananas
I don't like it when kids are on my lawn
I'm real good buddies with Aleve
I'm not a fan of most teenagers

I'm old.

I don't know how to work this remote...

Bloggy friend, It was time for another date with Braxton, isn't he cute?!
Our first order of business was to paint apparently this is the number one thing we MUST do when I get here. Then its watch a movie with popcorn and then its time to read a story then sleep.

They are moving soon, its really sad. I hate it when people that I babysit for super often move away.

Kali is probably one of my favorite parents ever, she isn't just some lady who pays me to be friends with her kid, she is definitely one of my best friends. Her and I talk about my family and my boyfriend =] and work and she likes to hear about it all. It's great. Her and Matt have one of the cutest marriages ever. Not that I would EVER tell them that, I like to make fun of them too much. :) I will one day be that in love with my husband. Its too good to miss.

Cheerleaders are scary. My daughters will never been one. Ever.
Thank you The Middle for making me realize that.

Both children are finally asleep, Sadie woke up and decided that she was just gonna party with us. I didn't have the heart to tell her she needed sleep, I mean really, if I am allowed to decide that I don't really need food she doesn't need sleep.

I don't really have a reason for blogging other than being utterly bored and not wanting to read my book because I've had the weirdest dreams. I keep waking up freaking out, its terrible.

The girl on the tv just said while talking to the mother of her boyfriend "We aren't having sex, I think we should wait. Atleast until... *insert very long pause and my hope for tv networks* college" Well that is horrible. Tv sucks. I don't even like tv. Why am I watching this?!
Also, another complaint, this mother is loving on her crying teenage son and everyone in their family freaks out because that is abnormal for their family. Families are not suppose to be like that.

Tonight, when I put Braxton to bed he yelled "WAIT!! I need my blessing!!" Good thing I already knew that Matt had given it to him. But I love that he asked for it. Blessings are my favorite parenting tool ever. I plan to use them as soon as I find out that I'm pregnant. The Skar's blessing is probably the best one I've ever heard. I love it when parents are interactive in their children's lives, and then when they are all about their child's spiritual life! Oh man! Its wonderful.

If you are going to grow up it should be a rule that you have to mature, atleast a little. This is gonna be one freaking long weekend.

Crap. I'm slowly falling back into the world that all i do is work.

Secret Agents

I have the wonderful privilege of being an alright babysitter so I get kids around me all the time.



Today its Micah, Jo, and Caitlyn.



I was a little worried at first with all three of them playing together. Jo has constantly left out but its good for Micah to have someone like Caitlyn to play with.
The game of the day has been secret agents. Lots of running around and hiding in the "clubhouse". Of course with this new friend Caitlyn has thrown me to the curb like last week's trash.


So I've had Jo as my best friend, she is one funny kid.
She is a huge kissing mood today, I wouldn't be able to count how many kisses I've gotten even if I tried. My favorite time today was when she repeatedly grabbed my face said "Hello" and kissed me. She is super cute =]

:) oh man. I must be super cozy.. Caleb is asleep on me... thats three people in two days

Mmm :) best day ever? I think so

Well folks its 8:42 and I've got everything i need to done. Productive i think so!

3 freaking 25!!!!

Hello again Bloggy friends!
I'm glad to see you here again.
Well its 3:25 and I am home from work.. yes sir, you read correctly. HOME!
It feels wonderful here. Of course I'm alone and I don't know if that is a good or bad thing.. but I'm home. EARLY! So stinkin nice.
I got so much done at work today, I could make a list but you don't wanna be here all day =]

The End.

Well Folks,
Its over.

I'm sure if you scroll down the page you will find a blog stating that I couldn't wait for these past two weeks to be over, well, they finally are.
I left CYT tonight (not crying! Haha SUCK IT!) with a whole lot of happy memories.
Note to self: never miss Cast Party, people get angry and mock you for the whole show
*cough* Alec Brown *cough*

I met wonderful friends, and read a book that I'm SURE will be published someday and I will be one of the first to own a copy (and on of the sequel!)
Never tell a pirate that you are going to charge them for the arguments they have with you... they only get worse.
NEVER make fun of someone at auditions, you end up spending way too much time with them.
Joey is a creep, but one of the good kinds. Its really fun to shut doors on him.
Olga was probably one of my favorite people of all time. I can't tell you everything that I liked about her that would take too long. I really really really liked that she was okay with who she is. That she knows that God made her that way. I like that she explains her feelings and she isn't afraid to tell you what she thinks of you. We need more people like that.
Emily, ah Emily. Probably one of my favorite things that God has ever made! She is sweet and loves hearing all my Josh stories. That's a must haha. She is probably on of the most adorable girls God made. She has such a loving heart. It's wonderful. I miss her already.
Maddy, haha Maddy. I totally thought she had the hots for Alec, so I tried to set them up... neither of them agreed.. but one day when they are married I'm gonna laugh. Just you wait.
Rachel, she is such a sweet girl. She is an excellent helper with the game Speed.. Really she is.
Danielle, she wasn't around much but I have to say that I love that girl's laugh. I never would've thought that I would like someone that her. That sounds mean and it probably is but I don't really care. haha. But she is wonderful and I got to know her and LOVE her!
I think I might still have some little girls markers in my bin, I sure hope she got those out...

I'm procrastinating, I should be emptying out my bin. I think that will be a little too sad though. I don't really wanna do it.. plus, where am I gonna put the bin and all the things it contains?! That's been their home for the past month, its unfair to take it away now! Haha.


Well, I'm finally ready to get back to my real life.
One filled with work and "normal" Kelli activities. A life filled with preschoolers and crafts. One where I'm stressed about silly things that won't matter in the end.
You know.. Over working-under paid.
OH! But I get a raise! HOW SWEET!

I am completely grateful that I got to spend the last two-ish months with CYT. I will return, I already made promises.
But... I am so glad I get to wear normal clothes again!!!

I am going to make it through today without crying. Just you wait

Fact: my mom is the funniest person ever.
Fact: Alec Brown is second in line
:)

I must be the perfect place to nap because I've had two boys fall asleep on me in the past week. There is nothing cuter than a sleeping boy

I would chose the darkest horse, that's the horse I'd ride

Welp, Bloggy friends.
On the work side of things, I epically failed tonight.
Just in time for yearly evaluations. Can we say score?!
I totally forgot about the work I brought home... I just needed to chill.
I can work on it tomorrow during Staff or something.

I should probably apologize to everyone who has had to listen to me about the Ex-Hippie, I know she means well. I guess I need to stop being one of those idiots I can't stand and just talk to HER about it. If I was in her shoes I would want something to work on that was mine something that makes me needed. I get that, I've been there.

We are having a party for my best friends birthday tomorrow night after Vertical. It's gonna be GREAT. I don't spend nearly enough time with her and I know that is all my fault, but tomorrow is gonna be good. Her and I need to have a good talk about wounds and feelings.
I know she needs it and secretly enjoys it, deep deep deep down inside but I need it too.
If I was broken I would want someone there to pull the darkest out of me. I wouldn't want something harmful inside of me like wounds. I know what it is like to go from wounded to freedom. It is something that is mind-blowing. I'm just trying to help her experience it.

Dear Myspace,

Today at preschool, Grace told me that I'm so beautiful that she could stare at me all day.
Now that's love. This little girl has told everyone that has ears that she would love it if I was her mom... I don't know why I have that effect on children. It doesn't seem right.

Hearing her say those things again makes me miss the boys I once thought were mine.
Maybe that's why God allowed us to take over Little Blessings, he knew the boys would disappear and that I would need something to do, little people to love. I never had a meltdown like I thought I would when they were gone for good... It was strange. My whole future shifted. It went from way to planned out, to going with whatever I had left. It was a strange shift.
I think I lost part of me when they disappeared. So much of me was put into those relationships, so many tears were shed over that "family" that I once thought I had.
Now, I fear to put any effort into any relationships. Unless I know for sure that it will be lasting. Unless I know they are secure and they aren't planning on dying and leaving me anytime soon.
I like being told they are mine, that's one thing that I missed about Rylan. He was full of words, lies or not. They were words that I longed for, that I "needed".
Words that I now cringe at. Words that now worry me.

One year ago today, Rylan tried to hang himself. Its only fair that I spend today in memory of what we had.
I don't miss worrying about if my best friend would kill himself that day or not.
A lot of freedom comes when that is no longer an issue.
A lot of freedom comes when you change your whole outlook on life.
A lot of freedom comes when you decide to live in reality.
A lot of freedom comes when you aren't afraid of losing loved ones because they no longer love you.